Our story picks up in 2002, when I was a senior in high school and Michael was a college freshman. I occasionally would see him on instant messenger, but honestly he wasn't really on my radar since he was A) dating someone else, and B) away at college. You could say we were casual acquaintances. Every year, our high school's AP English teacher would take her class on a field trip to the UNCC campus library to do term paper research in a college setting. I was doing my term paper on Hamlet (which I still can't bring myself to read or watch an adaptation of to this day, ten years later). My classmates and I piled on the bus for the hour-long drive to Charlotte. Once we got settled in at the library, my dear, over-achieving friend Joanna (remember her from the last post? The aspiring Star Wars fan?) gathered a hefty stack of "college books" that she wanted to take home and read. Unfortunately, not being a student, that wasn't going to happen. She was bummed, so she started asking around if anyone knew any UNCC student that might be willing to check out her books for her. Michael immediately popped into my head, and I told her I'd check online to see if he was around. He was. I struck up a conversation, told him we were at the library, and asked if he'd be willing to come check out Joanna's books. He of course said yes and jogged over to the library to meet us. After he made Joanna's day by checking out her books, he sat down in the library to chat. We fell into easy conversation like old friends, which has always been one thing that attracted us to each other over the years - how easily we could talk to each other. During the course of the conversation he told me he had recently broken up with his long-time girlfriend, and I pretended to be sorry. When our class left, he walked me to the bus and said goodbye, but we both knew it wasn't.
We talked a lot over instant messenger in the days that followed. The details of the development of our relationship are pretty fuzzy, but at some point we must have made it clear that we were interested in dating each other. Great! Except, oh, wait - at a church camp the previous summer, I had made a one-year commitment not to date anyone (don't you just love those?) so that I could instead focus on my relationship with God. I'm not quite sure why I made this commitment in the first place, since I hadn't dated anyone since my sophomore year of high school. But there it was. And no matter how silly or pointless it was, I was stubborn enough to adhere to it.
But Michael was, of course, very gracious. He told me he was willing to just spend time together as friends, until July 2002 when we could officially call it what it was. This was, like, January or something (I think). So that's pretty patient!
I wish I could remember more of what this time was like. I remember watching Michael play with my kitten, whom I'd rescued from the Bojangles parking lot on "the" 9/11. That cat was not quite right in the head and loved to bite, but as I watched Michael handle him with care and patience, and I remember thinking that was a good sign of his character. I remember him helping me do laundry out at my grandfather's house when our washing machine was on the blink. I remember him bringing me a wonderfully nerdy Valentine's Day present - a copy of The Silmarillion by Tolkien and a red heart-shaped lollipop. Other than these little details, three main memories of this time in our relationship stand out, and I'll tell you about them.
The first is a surprise date he planned for me. He drove to Statesville to pick me up and bring me to UNCC and told me to pack something nice to wear. When we got back to his dorm room, he had downloaded Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone (before it was on DVD, and before we had a conscience about digital rights violation). This was a lovely surprise, as I was a huge HP fan (still am) and had just convinced him to start reading the books. After we watched the movie, we dressed up and drove uptown to the Belk Theatre, where Michael had Charlotte Symphony tickets for us. My memory of the rest of the evening is pretty fuzzy too, but I being very impressed with his date-planning skills.
My second main memory of this time is our date to our high school's annual Masquerade Ball. I wore a pink tulle skirt and black velvet top (an outfit I'd pieced together on clearance that cost me about $8), and Michael wore the only tie he owned, which used to belong to his dad (and still hangs in our closet, though I don't think he's worn it since college). We took pictures with our "group" at Joanna's house (there she is again!), and we danced awkwardly (we're not really big on dances), and after the dance he drove me home in his blue Ford Explorer (you'll see this car again in the future). We sat in my driveway, my head leaning against him, and we both pretended we weren't intentionally getting our faces closer and closer together (remember - we're just friends until July!). At that rate, with our faces not-so-subtly inching closer together, it probably took us about ten minutes, but we finally had our first kiss (Oops - are those your lips I'm touching? Oh well, let's roll with it!). It was sweet and simple, and I felt light-headed as I walked into my house. The fact that I felt this way makes what happened next all the more inexplicable.
Sometime in March, I think, we bought tickets to go see Les Miserables along with my parents and dear friend Elizabeth. Over the course of our "just friends" relationship, I was still having some doubts about whether I could see myself dating him for certain when July rolled around. I cared for him, yes, and I was attracted to him, but I still had some annoying baggage and confused feelings about someone else I'd been trying to ignore, and I just wasn't sure. These doubts had been building, but I couldn't decide anything definitive. For some reason, though, after that night I made my decision. We dropped Michael off back at his dorm, and as we were driving away, I told Elizabeth that I had decided to call off our relationship, whatever it was, so as not to lead him on into thinking that this could turn into something serious. Later that night, or week, or something, during an instant messenger conversation (classy, right?), I told these things to Michael. I think I caught him completely off-guard, but by the end of that conversation, I had ended our relationship. I told him I just didn't see it developing into something more serious. Little did I know, he'd already come to the conclusion that I was the girl he wanted to marry. We did not speak to each other for the next 12 months.
To be continued...
Lost? Read Part One
here.
My "away message" after we broke up was "Leave me the hell alone" - I wasn't the happiest. So, I still lord this over her today.