This is a new song I just encountered this week that paints a really interesting picture of the Incarnation. It was co-written by Andy Gullahorn and Jason Gray, and is based on a short story by Walt Wangerin. I heard Andy Gullahorn perform it live this week, and I wasn’t really sure what I thought about it at the time. Quite honestly, it didn’t make sense to me. There are several metaphors running throughout the song, and that’s something you don’t encounter much. Usually a song won’t jump between metaphors without closure or connection. But in an interview about the song, Andy Gullahorn says:
"I have been playing this song most nights on this Christmas tour. Every night that I play it, at least one person finds me after the show to ask me about it. The standard comment I get is “I really like the song but can’t figure out what it means.” The funny thing is that in some ways I feel the same way about the original Wangerin story as well as the song - and that is part of why I think it is special. I mean, on one hand I can easily say what the song is about - the Incarnation. On the other hand, none of the metaphors in the story tie up neatly. It is about a battered woman - but it isn’t. It refers to Mary - but it doesn’t. All I know is that when I read the story I am deeply moved - but it isn’t a movement I can easily explain. It is like the truth in the story completely bypassed my brain and my reasoning to take up residence somewhere deeper. So although I can’t really explain it, it feels more true to me than some things that are more easily explained."
This is a great assessment of the song, because I come to the same conclusion. This song doesn’t resonate with me as much on a logical level as it does on an emotional one. I do love some of the ideas in the song, particularly when God (whose point of view narrates the song) admits that he could just break down the door and carry the woman away, but she might die from the fear. I love how this demonstrates the complete power and freedom God has to encounter his people, yet it shows that his desire is to come to us in a very specific, unique way that we wouldn’t expect and that in many ways defies logic. When you think about it, why in the WORLD God would choose to redeem his people by becoming one of us, dwelling among us, and taking our well-deserved punishment is beyond me. It certainly doesn’t seem like the most direct or simple choice of methods. But, of course, it is perfect.
Anyway, if you’d like to know more about the song, I’d encourage you to check out the rest of the interview on the Rabbit Room. And everything else on the Rabbit Room site.
Here are the lyrics, as well as a video of Andy performing the song live.
I Will Find A Way
JGray & Andrew Gullahorn
At the end of this run down tenement hall
Is the room of a girl I know
She cowers behind all the dead bolt locks
Afraid of the outside world
So how should I come to the one I love
I will find a way
Many thieves and collectors have used that door
But they only brought her shame
So she won’t even open it anymore
Still I will find a way
I could call out her name with love through the walls
But condemnation is all she hears
I could break down the door and take her into my arms
But she might die from the fear
So how should I come to the one I love
I will find a way, I will find a way
How should I come to the one I love
I will find a way
No hiding place ever kept her safe
So she hides inside herself
Now to reach her heart the only way
Is to hide in there as well
I will hide in there as well
She gave up on love waiting for a change
But a change is coming soon
Cause how could she not love the helpless babe
Who is waking in her womb
I found a way
She’ll know I am coming before I am here
When she hangs her head she’ll see me there
And then when I come she won’t turn away
All the beauty and joy will return to her face
And what of the loneliness? Now it is gone
Lost in the bond of the mother and son
Every sin that she suffered at the hands of men
Every single disgrace will be washed clean again
I will love her completely and when I am grown
I will carry her out of that tenement room
I am doing a new thing and soon you will see
I am coming among you and my name shall be
Emmanuel, Emmanuel
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